Bureaucracy

I was thinking recently that for a country that was founded by criminals Australia is really obsessed with bureaucracy. We care more about having the write form filled out, in triplicate, than most anything else in our lives down here. As though without that form filled, whether it be forged or false or whatever, we will loose our jobs or be spat on in the street. How much does it really matter? Who do you think you are fighting for when you chase me to sign something that I forgot to sign twice- once at the bottom and again on the other page, I’m sorry? I don’t understand where your determination is coming from. As if all other priorities take a back seat until you can get your psychological itch scratched and until then nothing else matters. Get over it! We have far to many outlaws in our past to let ourselves be held down after all this time- which I suppose is the problem- by red tape.

Trying to multitask one afternoon I thought I would use two of Meadowbank collages facilities at the same time. My reasoning wasn’t complicated and fell into the category of common sense at about the same time as the words ‘well, while I’m here’ came into my head.

Years ago, well about two, I went to this collage and spent some time (more than a bit) on the computers in the library which seemed to be open to the public. Well, at least to anyone who was motivated enough- being a few people on parol in my class who perhaps weren’t as keen. Anyway, these were mine and came with a lot of good memories which I considered on the way to my seat, having been to the before mentioned article at Meadowbank already.

The computers were locked and so I, heading to the desk for the code considered the unspeakable. What was I going to do if I needed to be a student to use the computers? Could I possibly convince this person that I was a teacher’s son? The principle’s was probably best. Did I look old enough to play a teacher? Would I be able to pretend I forgot my card and needed to use the computers for an assignment the next day- foster a little sympathy? All this before I even new if I had to be a student at all! I realised I was domesticated in some strange way and considered verbal threats for a second but getting to the desk I decided I would just ask. I would ask if I had to be a student to enter there little sanctuary. Already being a student at a bigger, more prestigious institution, I would rub that in their faces if they wouldn’t let me, asking if “this student card made a difference?” and watching them shade their eyes as the light reflected off the card.

The lady at the desk, who could have just as easily been the janitor as the librarian, looked at me like I didn’t exist. She could have only that morning have come out of a comma and decided to go work at a library. This didn’t mean, as you might think, that this person had no enthusiasm for their job, which was what I first supposed. Her passion for books was simply dwarfed by her passion for red tape, which made to her what I asked little more than a waste of time. She said only ‘no’. I told her that I was a student, if not a VIP member of her exclusive little library club, which seemed to have even less of an effect on her than my first approach. She replied by asking why I didn’t use a computer at university (15-20 km away), which I’ll admit, hadn’t crossed my mind. I’m sure if I really did have an assignment due tomorrow I would have considered this but in my current state all I wanted was to relax and use one of the twenty or more free computers in front of us to check my fucking email- and maybe some porn if I had time. I answered ‘because I’m not at uni’ and left.

My problem is with these and similar ‘rules’- however necessary some might be- and how they are enforced- by minions such as my new librarian friend. Why are some people so completely inflexible? Not a little bit, but completely- as if lives depend on them writing a correct prescription of Internet for the afternoon, without considering how their treatment of people- if my experience is to go by- might lead to a greater incidence of depression and mental disorders in the area as people wonder what they did to deserve such inhuman fucking treatment. How did such a characteristic grow out of a country like Australia though? Formed from people who were only put here because of their penchant for breaking rules.